The Extreme XOver
by honkugly
Summary: Harry Potter ASOUE HONK mainly, but there is a bunch of stuff in here. It's hilarious! A must read fro anyone who has heard of any of these three things!


**Author's Notes: Well, I've always wanted to write this. So, I guess this is it. Here I go.**

The Extreme X-over

Once upon in some land which apparently exists in this dude's head, there lived some things, which, also, apparently exist in this dude's head. Well these things were from stories that other people had written about these things. They were also from movies people had acted in, pretending to be things. They were also from musicals and plays where things had played or sang like a thing. These were some pretty weird things.

So, these things need to save the world from evil doers such as an evil dinosaur with a light-saber and a monster turkey who made it through Thanksgiving. So far, so dumb, right? But here's the good part. All the things had to meet together to destroy these evil-doers. These things were characters. (Insert sound of the clock from _24_ here.)

_**Border Border Border Border Border Border Border Border Border Border Border **_

"_There's little Tom Riddle, he's learning how to play the fiddle,"_ sang Albus Dumbledore to the tune of _Oom-pah-pah,_

"_But he knows what he wants to do with his dumb, old life, _

_He don't have much patience, or money or space stations,_

_But he has the ke-ey to eternal life,_

_Horcruxes, horcruxes, that's how it goes_

_Horcruxes, horcruxes, everyone knows_

_Whether it's hidden, or whether it shows,_

_It's the same horcruxes!"_

"Hello, Albus," said Captain Widdershins, who had magically appeared out of the somewhere of nowhere, "It's a fine day. Come out, Love Ducks."

"We're swans!" said Penny, "we're swans, you retard."

"I love money!" screamed Count Olaf.

"NOBODY MENTIONS MY NAME!" screamed Bill Sikes as he started beating Olaf.

"But I thought you're name was…" began Ugly.

"MONEY!" screamed Bill Sikes.

"Pop."

"Six."

"Squish."

"Uh-uh."

"Cinnabon."

"Lipshitz."

"Hold on," said Roxie, "Isn't it 'Cicero', not 'Cinnabon'?"

"This is revised honey," said Mama Morton who started eating M&M's.

"I quit," said Bob the Builder.

"_I got a Golden Compass, I got a Golden Compass,_" sang Charlie Bucket.

"That's mine, you stupid jerk!" screamed Lyra, "I don't know how the heck that got in your messed-up candy bar! Don't make me set my polar bear on you!" The polar bear jumped on him anyway and ate him. Then he got into it with Aslan.

"Haha!"said the White Lady formally known as The White Witch, "I have polar bears too. Maybe we can have a polar bear party sometime. Now I have to go hijack Santa Claus' sleigh. Ttfn."

"That was weird," said Violet Baudelaire.

"Hey, aren't you that girl who likes to chew gum?" asked an Oompah Loompah.

"Wrong Violet," said Violet. Klaus started reading and Fiona started hugging him for some reason.

"Whales," said Moby Dick.

"OMG!" said Aquamarine, "There was like, like, a whale like in like the like water. Like, weird."

"Hey everyone, I'm obsessed with myself," said Troy.

"Here, let me hump a locker," said Gabriella as she humped a locker.

"Where's my dog?" said Chad.

"Paris Hilton is my idol," said Sharpay.

"I speak basketball," said Taylor as she attempted to talk to a basketball.

"Oh, no you don't!" screamed Tracy as she banged every one of them on the head with a pot.

"But I was in your movie too," said Troy.

"Sorry," said Tracy and she banged him twice for good measure.

"Sniper, no sniping," said Dora the Exploder. Her monkey, Shoots, was nearby.

"Aw, man," said Sniper as he put his sniper down.

"_I am pretty, oh so pretty,_" sang Voldemort and Ron.

"I'm a werewolf!" said Lupin as he jumped on table, "RRRRRR!"

"Werewolves are in!" screamed Esme. "I love you!" She ran over and hugged Lupin. Tonks got angry.

"Hey, Harry," said Dumbledore, "Want to come into my office." He then winked.

"No!" screamed Harry as he ran around wildly and yelled random things.

"Wow," said Luna Lovegood, "He makes _me _look sane."

"Oh, my little darling," said Xenopholius Lovegood, "Have you found any nargals?"

"Oh, yes," said Luna, "This little sucker." She held up Carmelita Spats.

"Let me go, you cakesniffer!" screamed Carmelita, "My daddy's Bob Saget."

"One for the money, two for the money, three for the money!" said Count Olaf.

"NOBODY MENTIONS…" began Bill Sikes.

"Bill Sikes is Sike-o," said Galinda, the O.K Witch. Everyone gasped.

"Oh, no," said Nancy, "Now, you've done it! Now, this is what you call Oom-pah-pah!"

"Sike-o, sike-o," said Bill, "I hate little children." Bill Sikes grabbed Klaus.

"I'm little?" asked Klaus.

"Aaarggh!" screamed Bill Sikes. He held Klaus in the air and was about to drop him.

"You have some real anger management issues," said Voldemort, "Here let me help you. _Avada Kerdava._" Everyone closed their eyes except Dumbledore. The odd thing was that Klaus wasn't dead. Bill Sikes was.

_"WHATS"S NEW, BUENOS AIRES?"_sang Eva Peron as she walked in.

"You missed," said Klaus.

"I don't miss," said Voldemort.

"You suck, suck, suck, suck, suck, suck," said a few guys from Spaceballs.

"You know what?" said George Lucas, "I quit."

"NO!" screamed Jar Jar Binks, "Now Mesa Unemployed!"

"Let's all go to Starbucks," said the Wicked Witch of the West.

"You just want to go there because it's green," said a Who.

"Oh, shut up, midgets," said Olaf.

"We're WHO'S here," said the Whos.

"I love the band The Who," said Jojo. Everyone smacked their hands to their forehead, including Bill Sikes, who was dead.

"Cat buddies!" screamed the Cat in the Hat when he saw the Cat from Honk.

"Get off me!" screamed the Cat from Honk.

"GLOBAL WARMING!" screamed a random scientist.

"This is retarded," said Klaus.

"That's the point," said Mama Morton, "Whatever happened to class?"

"Ooh, candy," said a Death Eater. A dementor glided by with a Jonas Brothers T-shirt on.

"OMG!" screamed Esme, "Freaky cloaked things are in!" She grabbed a dementor and Lord Ombra.

"Crocodiles," said the croc.

"_Sing, sing a song,_" sang Dumbledore. Everyone joined in. Eventually, they were all crushed by the evil dinosaur with a lightsaber and the monster turkey.

**Author's notes: I know that was very short and random. Please review. Review!!! If you review I will put you on my favorites list. I want to know if this is funny. Until next time, goodbye.**


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